It appears you have your ducks in a row
however
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We have an existing action number
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Appear Specially for a Motion to dismiss prior to her proposed court date
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I'm not sure how it works there, but how does a case aquire an "action number" and a "proposed court date" where there is no joinder of the parties? From what you,ve described you haven't recieved the summons yet.
Are there child(ren) involved? If not, settle and get on with your life. If so, do whatever is necessary to stay out of their jurisdiction.
If jurisdiction is the issue it would seem that you would need to default and/or abate as idknow said. Make your ex prove the contract she's trying to use against you .
gldskr