Child Support and Custody cases combined

[swguitar]

n gator u need\ to read adventures in legal land fo this concept to sink in it can be bought at the same .com site

[Akira]

The magistrate is supposed to be neutral, but since they're paid by the state, and the state stands to gain, in your case, therefore, conflict of interest.

The rule of civil procedure contradicts the rule of evidence.

So make a point to make the clerk prove they're qualified. Otherwise, anyone could masquerade the part, and enter anything into evidence.

swguitar

I second that... and was going to add it, but saw your comment on a spell check review, before sending... lol

For HIS Glory,
Akira

[gatorguy3]

I did read the posting on that reading, but I do not have the money to buy the full book. If that is what I am thinking it is.

I did read the link though, when it was posted last; That adventures thing you are speaking about.

[Akira]

Adventures In Legal Land by Marc Stevens.

If you can't afford the book, download ALL the audio/video files here.

For HIS Glory,
Akira

[planetmark]

I realize this is an older post.. but I just found it, and wanted to comment.

My experience so far has led me to some personal theories on the subject of combining the custody and support issues. If you are even one payment behind, that opens the door for the opposition and the judge to brow-beat you by means of humiliation and disparagement into a defensive position where you "look bad". It also serves as a good attempt to throw you off balance, disrupt your train of thought, and makes you want to get diverted into arguing a useless point - i.e. "I'm not a bad guy. I'm having trouble getting a job", etc. which then gives them more ammo against you: "You can't get a job? You're a bad dad." You "look bad" again. At the end of the day, the ruling will be based on how bad you look, not the law.

On the other hand, if you are current in your payments, that must mean you are gainfully employed. So they will naturally start probing to find out how much you make so they can raise your "obligation". And since you are employed, they can now digress into "stereotyping", and tell you that you are the dad, you are supposed to work, and since you are working you won't be home all day to take care of your children. You "look bad" again. Moms can work 60hr/week, party every night, drink themselves into oblivion, and even hammer the drugs, but they are still capable of "taking care of the children" 24hrs/day because they are the mom... (duh) There is no earthly way to make a child's mother "look bad". One way or another, if the two issues are combined, the money factor WILL be used against you to prove you are not the most competent parent to have custody. They will use child support to influence custody to the mother, and then use custody to coerce child support from you. YOU, the male, ARE the cash cow that pays the pigs.

My ex's attorney loves to preach "irresponsible father" at every hearing because I haven't voluntarily sent one dime yet. They have garnished half my pay, but that doesn't even get close to my alleged obligation. I was on unemployment for 5 months, and they took half of that. As long as they get "something" every month, they will never persue any further action against you. But preaching "irresponsible father" makes the judge sleep better at night knowing that he is "helping" the mother and children by keeping you away from the children, and attempting to correct the injustice of you, the male, being "irresponsible" with your children's needs.

I think a killer solution would be to find a way to contact every "obligor" parent in the country, and have us all refuse to send in any more than $20 per month for 4 - 6 months. If we all hit them where they live at the same time, there would be a financial crisis in the family theft industry of earth shattering proportions.

[gatorguy3]

planetmark,

I agree with what you state, and it does make much sense.

I am going through much of that now. My ex's attorney and the attorney for the DOR have stated I am a bad father for not paying for support and that I have not willfully given them one dime. I have made them work for every dime. I am actually going to pull the tapes from each hearing and I am going to use what they say as bias. Things have been fairly calm lately as the DOR has initiated garnishment at half my monthly income. They still have to get insurance out of me. I have not seen my child but 2 times since March.

Your action of everyone not paying could be very effective however, there are too many who are fearful of the immediate consequences.

[planetmark]

I feel your pain. I have six children, and my ex left me with a full-blown restraining order for one year. I couldn't even talk to her. She is clueless, though, and will do whatever her attorney says to do. So I keep fighting, and have seen my children at least one day per week every week since March. Time with them keeps increasing, so I know it can't get any worse.

Don't ever let anyone make you "feel" bad about child support. That is Hitler's masterpiece, and PAYING it is un-American and irresponsible. It just feeds the beast. If custody is about appearances, you've already lost because you are male. The children will always have food and shelter, so do all you can to secure YOUR future - they will need you to be secure and stable down the road. Try to find work that doesn't require your SSN, and DON"T TELL them about it! Don't run it through your bank account either. There's a million ways to make cash on the side. Stash it away and prepare for your future.

I know from experience that there is nothing to fear for falling behind on payments... they told me directly "just pay SOMETHING" and they will not harrass you. So that's why I suggest everyone paying "something", like $20, for a short time of 4-6 months. The full payments can always be put aside and caught up afterward. But six months of nearly no payments will surely get a whole bunch of their Agents layed-off, and cause all sorts of stress in their little empire. It would be a national crisis, and we the victims of their tyrany would enjoy every minute of it!