Greenspan: Debt not threat

[Questor]

This is my first article written as that somewhat irascible icon impaler, Rebutticus.

In the business section of today's bird cage liner (about the most charitable thing that I can say about the San Bernardino Sun Telegram or ANY newspaper by the way), is an article by one MARTIN CRUTSINGER in Washington. I think that I can safely assume that the District of Criminals is the actual situs, not the State of Washington, as the D.C. is the place where virtually all of this tripe comes from. It kind of echoes back and forth between the walls of once great hallowed halls, building upon itself somehow, drowning out reason and logic. One idiot politician says something stupid, and before you know it, the idiots in the press are repeating it over and over, making it into some new mantra of the financially illiterate.

So in this article that is supposed to give us great reassurances that all is well for the average person in America, ALAN GREENSPAN offers up more B.S. per minute than a herd of Texas Longhorns. The more that I read or hear coming from His Most Excellent Prevaricator of the Financial World, the more that I'm convinced he must be a cretin or maybe a zombie. How else could one possibly explain the contradictions, false data and twisted logic that spews ever forth? If GREENSPAN had a dozen sides to his mouth, he'd be speaking out of all of them at the same time. Hmmm.... maybe that IS the case after all.

In this article penned by someone who is alleged to have at least a smattering of ability to think in a straight line when it comes to things financial, GREENSPAN is quoted as saying that the amount of personal debt being carried by Americans is not a threat to the U.S. economy. Oh really ALAN?? Then pray tell us what WOULD be a threat to it? Certainly not the fiat currency with no value to it would be any kind of problem, would it? And of course the fact that the government is in the red to the tune of trillions of dollars now has no bearing upon it, right, ALAN?? Or the fact that we have gone from a producing nation to a consuming one, where many hope to get rich by selling each other burgers and t-shirts, THAT wouldn't endanger the U.S. economy, would it? No, of course not! Little things like that are GOOD for an economy, according to His Most Excellent Professor of All Things Monetary!

Little does the tiny cretin from the Fed realize that these "pockets of distress" as he refers to them, where there are high levels of personal bankruptcies, are in fact more than just pockets scattered here and there, like maybe a few holes in an old window screen. They are more like the perforations in a sheet of paper to make it easier to tear off at a designated point. Apparently, the gnome from the unreality zone cannot see the blood red ink hemorhaging from all of those holes! And just like the skin of an airplane with the rivet holes spaced too closely together, there will be a tearing, a ripping sound the likes of which will make grown men cry like babes in arms when its peal echoes across the land.

According to His Most Wise of Wisest Financial Gurus, it is "unlikely that either the high level of household debt or the big rise in housing prices represented serious threats to the economy because Americans appeared to have sufficient resources to keep meeting their loan payments", quoting Mr. CRUTSINGER now. And according to GREENSPAN, "Short of a significant fall in overall household income or in home prices, debt servicing is unlikely to become destabilizing." Oh yes, I feel SO much better now that GREENSPAN has spoken sooth and all is once again calm upon the financial seas which cover the abyss. Who writes his stuff? People wacked out on LSD or chronic drunkards?

GREENSPAN does concede however that price bubbles could be created by conditions in local markets, as opposed to one being difficult to generate nationwide due to different forces at play around the country. Oh yes, ALAN GREENSPAN has just declared that the oldest concept in real estate, written down when dirt was just invented is now official! That old adage of the first three laws of real estate being Location, Location, Location are now legit. So not to worry folks! You'd better believe it because the God of Money just said so!

GREENSPAN, the Magnificent Money Manipulator and only one who knows what's really going on in the financial world, has said that "household debt has been rising faster than incomes for at least the last 50 years as Americans have enjoyed rising levels of discretionary income, which they have used to buy more and more items on credit". HUH?!?! If there was a rising level of "income" ALAN, then would you PUULEEZE tell us idiots out here in the peanut gallery why they were then purchased on credit instead of with cash?? It's totally amazing to see words coming out of his mouth in that spiral fashion, it's like a tornado of lies and deception I guess. And it's about to carry us off to some place far far away. We soon won't be in Kansas anymore Toto. Hang on to your fur little friend, because everything else is about to wind up somewhere else.



Rebutticus